Ep. #1044 - Creating A Career You Love

Matt Watson 00:00
And we’re back for another episode of the Startup Hustle. This is your host today, Matt Watson. Excited to be joined by Dr. Benjamin Ritter. And he is from the company, Live Yourself Consulting, or Live for Yourself Consulting. Sorry. And we’re gonna be talking today all about loving your career, loving what you do, which I’m excited to talk about. I love what I do. Although, sometimes, I still think I’m trying to figure out what I want to do when I get old, like a lot of people do. So excited talking about that today. Today’s episode of Startup Hustle is powered by FullScale.io. Hiring software developers is difficult. Full Scale can help you build a software team quickly and affordably. And has the platform to help you manage that team. Visit FullScale.io to learn more. Dr. Benjamin Ritter, welcome to the show.

Benjamin Ritter 00:47
Hello, hello. And I love what you said about I’m still trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up. Because you should be, you know, it’s called a career for a reason. A career is a combination of jobs and experiences. So you can always choose to do something else tomorrow if your heart desires it, right? Or even just your curiosity.

Matt Watson 01:07
Well, we should also mention you were on the show before. About a year and a half ago. Or no, two and a half years ago. There’s an episode called Self-Leadership; it was actually an extremely popular episode of the Startup Hustle podcast. So if anybody wants to go back and listen to that, check that out. So why don’t you remind us, Ben, again, of what you do and what your company does?

Benjamin Ritter 01:30
Yeah, so I split my time between creating organizations that people can fall in love with. So that’s all the processes and programs that relate to that. So talking about engagement, orientation, onboarding, leadership, training, and all that jazz. And then one-on-one coaching with leaders for them to help create a career that they can fall in love with. So kind of trying to hit the wick on both ends here. So make some movements that hopefully empower others to craft their career to be one that they can fall in love with. And hopefully, that is also known as organizations being places that people can fall in love with as well.

Matt Watson 02:11
Well, I’m gonna guess that it starts with the top right. You’re usually helping a CEO or some other leader, and they figure out that they need some help. And then, ultimately, you also potentially go in and help the company at a larger scale because that kind of what happens if you can work with the executive team.

Benjamin Ritter 02:25
And so I tried to I tend to work with CEOs and then a lot of the like SVPs and senior directors, they if you can help them develop as leaders and to understand what it truly means to feel like you have control over your career where you’re proactive, instead of reactive, to be able to craft your job to be best aligned with who you are. And they can do that for their teams. And then they can do that for their teams, and they can do it for their teams. And so you kind of have this waterfall trickle-down effect, which can really have a strong impact within an organization. Ultimately, curating a culture that relates to caring about your people and ensuring that, you know, it’s not just about hitting certain numbers. It’s about making sure that people are enjoying the path toward those numbers. And there’s so much research that has shown that if you can get people engaged and satisfied at work, I mean, productivity increases, absenteeism decreases, turnover decreases. And so it’s easier to hit those numbers and those goals that you have as well if you can create an organization like this. And ultimately, like, I just want people to be happy and to feel hope. And so often, I work with leaders, and they come to me just pretty much in disbelief that they can actually feel that their work is meaningful. And that creates a lack of confidence in yourself. Because if you wake up every single day dreading going to work, you’re not going to feel good about yourself, either because you’re going to feel that you’re a failure, you’re not doing what you need to do. And so ultimately, like that’s not how people should be living. We should enjoy every single day as if it’s a gift. And that motivates me. Like when I wake up each and every single day you thought you knew, you had that note in the beginning. I kind of wonder what I’m gonna do tomorrow. If I ever wonder where I go, how can I live this value? A little bit more today?

Matt Watson 04:09
Well, they gave me a statistic here that says that by 2022 the report states that in the US specifically, 50% of workers report feeling stressed at their jobs on a daily basis, 41% as being worried, 22% are sad, and 18% are angry. That’s tough. Yeah, that is tough to hear.

Benjamin Ritter 04:32
That’s tough stuff here. Have you ever felt that way?

Matt Watson 04:35
Um, you know, I have been more in a leadership position, you know, and an owner of a company for the last 20 years. But along the way, of course, there were periods where there was a lot of uncertainty or I wasn’t sure about the right way to lead the company or lead the team or what to do or how to solve a problem or, you know, stress from different personal things or whatever. Like, I feel like we all go through ups and downs, right? It’s all a rollercoaster.

Benjamin Ritter 05:03
If we take a look and kind of turn the lens into our personal lives instead because I think we know how to make things work for us, especially if you’re an entrepreneur, like you probably are a high achiever, you know how to solve a problem. And for some reason, when it comes to our jobs, we forget that. So we’re not happy at work, we go, oh, this is just a product of our environment. This is a given. But that’s not the case whatsoever. So these individuals are stressed and frustrated, and scared most of the time. The issue with this isn’t the fact that you feel that because feelings are normal. It’s the fact that you give in to that feeling and say, Oh, this is just what work is like, and that, that surrender to an emotion, it doesn’t happen almost in any other area of our life.

Matt Watson 05:55
Well, so what do you recommend to people that feel like that the culture, the work culture, that they’re a part of, kind of hampers that, right? They go to, they go to work, and they’re like, Well, we know we can fix all these things by getting me to do them, nobody listens. Somebody wants to change anything, or they set in their ways, right? Like, my boss is a jerk. Whatever the things are, that’s usually what people run into, right?

Benjamin Ritter 06:18
The first thing that we need to do, or you need to do if you’re listening, is to let go of the belief that this is something that you can’t change. Or let go of the belief that this isn’t something that you want to spend time on, it’s too much work, or that it won’t work for you. You’ve probably had these people come in, they’re like, I want help, I want to work with you. And then they create these excuses of, well, this wouldn’t work for me, or I don’t have time for this. And if we allow those excuses to dictate our actions, then we’ve created we curate our own environment. So what you really first need to do is say that it’s possible for me to be happy at work, it’s possible for me to change things. Once you do that. Now we have something to work with. And that mindset is crucial. I know some people may be rolling their eyes a little bit at this advice. But if your belief is already negative, if your belief that this is impossible, it’s not going to work. And so after that, then we can say, because I’ve experienced this too, by the way, I worked in healthcare for six years. And most of that time, I’d say about four years of that was me believing in myself, accepting that this was what work was, that it was supposed to be draining, that it was dreadful that Mike’s leadership was terrible. And I was the victim of that. When I woke up, finally, this was what I wanted everyone to do next. That’s when things started to change. That’s when I was able to, and I started being able to craft my job. So what you need to do is figure out, okay, so what’s draining me? What are the things that are actually causing me to be dissatisfied? And so very often we feel something such as anger, fear, or frustration, and we allow that motion to be undefined. So list off these things? Is it a specific person? Is it your leader? Is it a piece? Is it a work project that you’re a part of? Is that time of day that you’re working? Is it the location that you’re working in? Because when you have the things that bother you, then we can start saying, okay, so what am I going to do next? What am I going to do about this? Do you want to do the same thing about the things that you love? What projects? Do you love working on what people do you love working with? What time of day? Do you love working on anything and everything about the actual work that you do because that’s the first pillar of job satisfaction? So then start being able to make some adjustments to stop to continue to delegate to increase to decrease. And so this is basically a work audit. And that’s the first step. It’s what drains you, what energizes you? And now what can you do about it? And if we have the belief that we can’t do anything about it, of course, we’re going to get stuck here, which is why we did that first step. So I’ll pause. Because we can dive more into how to actually do this work audit, how to go to your leader and ask for these adjustments, and how to actually craft some of your projects and work. But it is the first step.

Matt Watson 08:59
Well, so related to this several years ago. I don’t remember exactly when, but I think it was on Facebook. I was scrolling through, and I saw somebody posted a picture. And it was like a roadside sign where you know, make the letters on the thing. And it said You’re in charge of your own happiness. And that really stuck with me. And, you know, another year or two went by, and I was having some issues in my personal life. And I always kept thinking about that. I’m like, You know what, I’m in charge of my own happiness. If I’m not happy, I gotta do something about it. And I finally did. I had some personal things I had to deal with. And, you know, I got to the point where I was so frustrated with everything that I was like, You know what I have to do if I just keep doing the same thing every day, nothing’s going to change, right? Like, I’m not gonna get a different result. And so I had to make some changes. And can you relate to that? And have you heard that story before?

Benjamin Ritter 09:51
Way too often. That’s why people tend to come to work with me. I’ve gotten to a breaking point. Yeah, and something needs to change. Ah, usually, the solution at this point is someone needs to quit without any sort of backup plan. I hope to work with individuals prior to them quitting. Because we tend to burn our bridges, we tend to lose career capital, and we tend to be a little hasty. We do things that don’t serve us because of our emotions instead of actually, you know, being intentional toward our goals. Like, for example, if a project is really draining you, let’s say you take something as simple as email, I get so many emails I can’t get to it every single day, I stay up till midnight replying to them to clear my inbox, I go great, don’t reply to your email for a day, see what happens.

Matt Watson 10:39
Nothing will happen. It’ll still be there when you get back, and the projects and things that you’re working on.

Benjamin Ritter 10:41
Most of the time, people might have to adjust to your lack of response time. But usually, things aren’t that critical. Or I really just like to, you know, work on this report, this report, I don’t even know if anybody reads it. Okay, don’t send it out once. See if anybody replies. And if you’re too nervous about that, go talk to your boss and say, do you use this report? Or go to the stakeholders? What do you use this report for? Is there a different cadence timeline that you can get this report on? Is there someone else that can do this report, or you may find out that one person only needs great train that one person to pull it for themselves? It’s taking control of the things that drain us? Oh, someone really bothers you. Well, have you tried conflict mediation and direct feedback? Or Okay, so you engage with them, you sit right next to them? Can you change where you sit? It’s like these little tiny adjustments that can be game-changing to provide us more energy for our jobs, which may lead us then to go find another job. But it’s a lot easier to find another job when you’re in a positive headspace and have more energy, right? Because no, sometimes I’ll work with a client. I work with a client. They come in, and they’re supposed to work on building their network and having relationships, you know, having conversations with other people and getting curious about them. So they can access the hidden job market to get to their next opportunity. But they come home and they’re done with work. And they might be done with work at 5pm. They have a whole evening to do some of the stuff. But they’re so mentally drained from the stress and their negative beliefs around their work that they can’t do it. I can’t do it.

Matt Watson 12:18
So tell me more about the workout.

Benjamin Ritter 12:22
Yeah, so I mean, really simple. I’ll make it easier for people. Right? The number one thing that drains you down, the number one thing that drains you about your work is specific. What is it? I was working with a client the other day, and it was that they didn’t like that decisions were being made without data? I was really surprised. I was like, oh, that’s an interesting thing the drains do. I haven’t heard that one before I go, okay, how can you be more data oriented with the decisions that are made at work? He’s like, Well, I guess I could ask for it myself. As anyone presenting from that. No. It’s like, wow, this feels really good. And just write one, the one thing that drains you the most about your job? Is it, oh, I don’t get recognized or I don’t get feedback from a leader. Well, that’s a big one. Have you ever asked for recognition or direct feedback? Have you ever finished a presentation and gone directly to your boss and said, Hey, can you tell me about what were the top three things that you understood from that presentation? You asked for specific feedback. Try that down, write that down. Number one thing that stresses you out, and then next, write the number one thing that makes you happy that energizes you. And when you identify that, do that one more time per week. It’s these little adjustments from our work that can add a lot more energy. And even just a little bit more satisfaction can be enough for us to stay at our standard job and to be happy at work and to take advantage of the opportunities that it presents us. Now if we’re looking diving in a little bit further, resources tend to be a pretty big deal when it comes to the actual work and career development tends to be a pretty big factor as well. So we have what we like and what we dislike about career development. So how am I going to grow? So how can you start learning something on a weekly or quarterly basis at your job? And all you have to do is identify what this is and bring it to your boss, or go to your boss’s boss for a peer. And there they tend to, will involve you because they always want people to be engaged and to develop in their jobs. If that’s not the case with your culture, we’ll talk about getting another job. And then the other piece in terms of resources is there’s some people that I worked with that just go. It’s really frustrating, because I need to wait for the printer at work. It’s terrible. It delays the ability to work on projects. I go, okay. Have you ever um, some people might be rolling their eyes, but it’s this lack of empowerment and accountability that drains us. They have asked your boss for an extra printer. Right? What can you do about that? Do you need to print the materials? Can you save it as PDFs and share it in a different way? So Again, problem solving, we tend to do it so often in our personal life, we forget to do it. In our professional life.

Matt Watson 15:07
People just get used to doing things the same way. And they’re, they’re draining, but they don’t, they don’t take the action to change them.

Benjamin Ritter 15:15
Why have to do it this way, because if I don’t, I’m in trouble. People are going to think poorly of me, or I’m going to lose my job, to beliefs that are radically untrue. Most of the time. People are too busy thinking about themselves. So they’re not worried about you. Most of the time, your boss TouchSensor is concerned that the work gets done, because they have different goals than you do. And then when it comes to you losing your job, well, let’s go get a side hustle. And not having to worry about it so much, but also tends to be we, if we act in a place of fear at work, we’re not going to be ourselves. And we’re probably going to curate an environment that we end up losing our job anyways. So it’s better to show up and be energized and engaged, and more likely to create change and innovation and do your work in a way that people appreciate.

Matt Watson 16:07
Right? Well, I want to talk more about your new masterclass. But before we do that, I do wanna remind everybody that finding experts, software developers doesn’t have to be difficult, especially when you visit FullScale.io, where you can build a software team quickly and affordably. Use the Full Scale platform to define your technical needs, and then see what developers are available to join your team today. Visit FullScale.io to learn more. So before we started recording today, you were telling me about a new masterclass that you just released? Tell us more about that.

Benjamin Ritter 16:39
So coaching programs are a pretty large financial investment. And they’re also a pretty large time investment. So weekly coaching, worksheets and exercises are 24/7 back and forth. So they’re pretty high-touch. And they for this masterclass specifically, that would go for about six to eight weeks. What I wanted to do was provide individuals that didn’t have the financial means as well as were more self motivated learners to be able to do this type of program on the road. So the masterclass itself covers how to create clear clarity for yourself. So we go through, what would you like to go, we do some retirement visioning, we do some fast forward visioning. We do some career pathing in terms of taking a look at the multiple branches and paths that could lead you towards those specific careers that you’re interested in. We go over job crafting, which is what we just discussed. So ensure that you’re energized to be able to find that next job or be able to be happy at work because we just talked about one area, which is the work audit, there’s still the social relationships and meaning pieces of job crafting. Then I provide a variety of templates and guidance on how to find a job resume to your LinkedIn profile to networking to cover letters to actual interviewing and getting that job and this and bonus modules as well.

Matt Watson 18:06
Okay, so where can people find that masterclass?

Benjamin Ritter 18:11
If you go to live for yourself consulting.com, you’ll find a link to the masterclass at the top of the site. You can also connect with me on LinkedIn. By the way, Dr. Benjamin Ritter, I’m happy to have a conversation with anybody, you know, share the link with you directly to let me know that you heard me on this show, I’ll give you a special promo code.

Matt Watson 18:29
So let’s talk more about creating a career that you love. You know, earlier, we were talking about dealing with various work issues and you know, trying to fix some, you know, problems that people have. But tell me more about creating a long term career that you love and how to do that.

Benjamin Ritter 18:49
And one of the greatest mistakes I see individuals make is they don’t take action, because you’re not sure what actions to take. They get stuck, we’re in this place of I don’t really know it’d be a fulfilling career. So I’m just going to do what I’m currently doing. Career Clarity doesn’t tend to come from some epiphany that you’ve had without experiences or action, or from doing the same thing. Career Clarity, yes, can come from reflection and should come from exploring what you’ve experienced, because our experiences tend to create our passions and our purpose and what’s meaningful to us tends to be where we work, what roads we tend to travel on. What career clarity comes from conversations, from many projects, from action. And so the first step, if people are confused, and they feel stuck, and they’re not sure what to do, would be to explore what you have experienced in your career. Those most fulfilling moments because some people forget they have been fulfilled before and the things that interest them the most. And then you put on your sailors hat, jump in your ship, and you start going on an expedition Trying to find that treasure. And the only way to do that though, is to go on an adventure and go explore some of these ideas that you have.

Matt Watson 20:08
So, do you feel like most people really struggle to ever do that? Like, they always just have 1000 1000 excuses not to write, it’s like, I’m too busy in my personal life, or I’m not sure if that’s going to work, or I don’t have the right education, or I don’t have this. They just fill their head full of reasons why they can’t do it. Right.

Benjamin Ritter 20:28
Yeah, I think people are really close. A lot of times, I work with a client that is just so disheveled and so anxious and so stressed about their career and not knowing what they need to do. And we just spend a little bit of time exploring the beliefs that are holding them back. This is your career trauma. So what are the moments in your career that have left a negative mark on you that scorched you, the branded you understanding that those experiences are not reality, and that they are one individual experience that you’ve had. So they shouldn’t be beliefs, maybe they mean, we explore them and find that some of them are a little bit true, but most of the time, they’re just holding you back. So we let go of those. And then we start exploring the highs and lows of their career, we are able to identify what they’re interested in personally, not what other people are doing what they’re interested in. And everyone has some things that they’re interested in front of the media that they’ve consumed, from their parents, from their friends. And then you start exploring those interests. And after you get some semblance of an idea of the things you want to explore, you also can explore your personal values. And that’s kind of like your interests, but a little bit further, further down. It’s at the core of your attitudes and beliefs. And these can be pulled out from where you’ve been happiest, where you’ve been most dissatisfied with those themes, and then how you would define yourself personally. Because then when you start exploring these different areas of interest for your career, which can be something as simple as I’ve always wanted to work in the psychedelic space, or I’ve been really interested in Nike as an organization. But if you understand your values, those values can orient you towards an area where you would feel more aligned. And so instead of maybe working on a certain product of Nike or working in the employee satisfaction department, because your values are about health and growth and learning.

Matt Watson 22:27
Well, so how do you define success for somebody in their career? I’m curious, curious how you would define that.

Benjamin Ritter 22:36
Success in a career? Well, it’s not a certain level of achievement. Unless I’d say that is a specific goal that you set for yourself, and then we’d have to really make sure that it was a positive goal, because they’re going to be anti goals, where the outcome of that goal isn’t within your control. And so it’s actually not something that you should define your level of success by. Personally, if someone is working towards their values, that’s why the meaning behind what they do is so for me. Personally, I have health, I have growth, I’ve impact, I’ve openness, how I do things can change. So that means I can be an executive at an organization, I could be a business owner, I could be a consultant. And though, you know, those outcomes are goals that I set for myself. And if I achieve them, great, but if I get to do the work that I love, that matters to me, and I’d say that is personal success, I have some clients that would disagree, that’s okay. Because we work towards their goals with them, they have some financial goals, they have some title goals, they have certain team size goals, which is great, which is fine, it keeps them motivated and keeps them working towards something specific. But ultimately, if ever, those values get out of whack, they’re not going to feel successful. So I’d say there’s, there’s some aspect of career success, that is I just want to hit this tangible thing. But then there’s a greater aspect of it, which is, are you able to wake up every single day and feel proud and fulfilled by what you’re working on? And why you’re working on something instead of how you’re working on it.

Matt Watson 24:29
Well, so for those that are working towards these goals, and you know, a bigger team, a certain job title, whatever. How do you coach them about how to measure progress towards those goals?

Benjamin Ritter 24:42
So we have to look at what’s in your control and what you’re in control of, for example, working with a client right now, who is trying to increase his deal flow because he wants to acquire a business. You know, his initial goal was to acquire a business and quit his job. Now Those are tangible things that he can do. But ultimately, we want to track his success by his progress. So is he certified? Does he have a buyer profile? As he reached out to brokers, those are things that he can do that we can measure success by. So for example, if someone wants a bigger team, or they want a promotion, you know, measure your success by the promotion we measure your success by Have you built relationships with the executive team? Have you studied how to manage a larger team? Have you had conversations with individuals from other organizations that are managing larger teams? Have you talked to your leader about wanting to manage a larger team and gotten that onto your performance development plan? So that’s how we measure success.

Matt Watson 25:52
So when one thing happened during the pandemic, during COVID, I decided to start playing chess, I got into chess, and I actually got one of those posters into my office, it says, Keep Calm and play chess. And it’s like my daily reminder that maybe when things aren’t going my way, or, you know, I’m trying to accomplish something that sometimes I have to slow down and think about kind of like playing chess, right? It’s like, it may take a few moves, I may need to be on the offense, I may need to be in the defense, I may need to change my position. Like, you know, you just gotta keep playing the game, right? And that feels like a lot of our careers.

Benjamin Ritter 26:34
In what’s in your control, and what’s out of your control, even you know how you respond to an emotion is within your control. If you feel sad and unmotivated well, did you do the one thing that matters today, and they can help you make progress? Or did you just get into it? When you’re applying to jobs is one of the greatest things on film. I’m recording a podcast tomorrow about the three greatest mistakes that job seekers make. And one of them is discouraged discouragement. It’s you apply for up to 10 jobs, you don’t hear back and you think that it’s hopeless, you send five connection requests on LinkedIn, you don’t hear back from anyone. So you think that no one ever wants to talk to you. We, we magnify this concept of rejection, because we think impacts our identities as individuals, if we let results impact our identity and our self worth and our ability to be successful, then we were creating an opportunity, given opportunity for failure, because by default, progress is going to involve setback, involve rejection, involve things not working out. It’s I was talking to a client the other day, he was really discouraged about the interview process. And he’s, he got a bunch of interviews, he didn’t make it to the final round, and didn’t even apply to that many jobs. It was like, Do you know that about 400 to 1000 people apply to a job, and you made it to the third round? That is incredible. Like the odds of that actually happening are so slim, you should see that as a badge of honor. And it’s very difficult for individuals to see the opportunity instead of the setback.

Matt Watson 28:13
Well, you’re absolutely right, you know, it’s it’s, you know, it steps right, like, Hey, you made it to the third round this time, maybe next time you’ll make it further right. And that is progress. At Full Scale. Sometimes we get 1000 people a month that apply for a job, and we’ll only hire 2% of them. 3% of them do something like that. And so, there are a lot of people that can apply for these jobs. Absolutely.

Benjamin Ritter 28:37
So then you look at that and you go great. How can I increase my chances of getting a job at this organization? And who should I talk to? Who should I start building a relationship with? Not Who should I go ask for a job? It’s how do I just get more information? How do I talk to someone and have an actual conversation around? Hey, what’s your work at Full Scale? Like? Awesome, this seems really neat. I’ve done that type of work before. These are my experiences. What’s next on your plate? That Full Scale? Oh, interesting. Thank you for sharing that man. You know, I’m really curious, how do people tend to get hired there? Is there anything else? Is there anything that sets people apart? Is there any type of person that you’re looking for specifically? And so now I’ve had this conversation with you? And what is the likelihood that if you are impressed by me that you go, I’ll put my name in the hat for you? I’ll, I’ll I’ll refer you or you know what we don’t I wish I wish not hiring right now, we’ll probably hire in about six months. But I do know this other person at an organization that really could use you. And so we go, okay, the only way to apply for a job is to go online and hit apply. Oh, that’s not true. Who said that? So again, how do we become accountable and empowered for the outcomes that we want to see?

Matt Watson 29:43
Well, most people don’t do any of that follow up, follow up or do any of that homework or do any of that extra work? Right? They apply and they’re done. It’s like a yes or no thing and they don’t put in any extra effort.

Benjamin Ritter 29:57
I like to when I’m working on networking with a client I’d like to say, okay, so you want to go talk to this person at this organization, we’ve identified this in our Career Clarity work, that you are really interested in these types of organizations. So let’s target your future potential boss. So you always want to talk to someone that’s a level above you, you can talk to peers, but it’s more effective to talk to someone one level above you. Now imagine, you are going to be given a million dollars. If you give them a million dollars, let’s say you have an imaginary million dollars to give, and you get a million dollars, if you get the chance to give it, how do you give it to them? How do you get in touch with them? How do you get them to agree to talk to you? How do you get them to believe you? That’s the type of initiative that I want to see people take.

Matt Watson 30:45
Like that. I’m gonna give away a million dollars all night tonight. Yep. If anybody gets a message from LinkedIn for me tonight, you’ll know why I’m coming to give you your million dollars. I like it.

Benjamin Ritter 31:00
Yeah, you send them a message on LinkedIn, they don’t reply, you engage on their content, you like it, you share it, you tag them, you wait a week, you send them another message, open it reply, you go to rocket, you know, rocket reach or whatever.com, you get their email, you wait a week, you send them an email, just checking in, nothing, you go look and see if they’ve done any podcasts, you go talk, you email that host and say, Hey, I’m really looking for an introduction to this guest that you had on I really love that episode, you know, like you do everything and anything to get a hold of this person. And though no reply, because usually they will.

Matt Watson 31:33
If nothing else, they will just get you to go away. Like, this person will not leave me alone, I’m gonna have to talk to them. I had somebody once I’ll never forget this. One of my first companies, I was just working, you know, in the office, and some guy just showed up. And he’s like, hey, I want to talk to you about investing in my company. And I’m like, Who the heck are you? Why are you here? He’s like, Well, because I want you to invest in my company. And you know, what, I sat down, I talked to him. And I did, I invested in this company that was blown away, I was blown away by how much effort that guy put into it. And just, you know, and to this day, he’s he’s still a friend of mine, and is just, you know, what you put in the effort as your as you showed, he was the guy who was trying to try to take my million dollars, not like me, give him a million. He wasn’t trying to give me money. He was trying to take my money. But it worked. It did, it worked.

Benjamin Ritter 32:29
And it’s a great story. And if people are wondering, oh, isn’t someone gonna think that I’m bothering them, if you do it is if you never use the same media channel three times in a row. So you can use it twice, and then change how you’re trying to engage with somebody, and you space it out, you know, a week to a month, even three months to six months for some of the you know, follow ups person is not going to remember you or they’ll remember you a little bit to say, oh, that person has initiative, not Oh, that person is really annoying. And I’ve had people to whom I’ve reached out to. And then a couple months later, I talked to someone that knows them. And I go, Hey, can you introduce me to this person, they go, of course, they introduced me to that person, the person like has no idea that we that I tried reaching out to them before or that we had like a small engagement and nothing happened from it. Or our attention span. The ability to remember is so minimal unless we have a severe negative experience, or severe positive experience. So you mean keep that in mind? I? It’s like okay, so I asked everyone listening, who was the guest of their favorite podcast, they listened to you two weeks ago. It’s like, okay, what was the what was the what were three of the characters of the last book that you’ve read? Or a book that you read a month ago? It’s super difficult to answer these questions. And so just keep that in mind. Don’t worry so much about what if this? And what if someone doesn’t want to talk to you? Or if they’re annoyed by you? They’ll let you know.

Matt Watson 33:56
Yeah, just don’t just don’t leave them with that overly negative memory, as you said, right? Like, that’s what people will remember.

Benjamin Ritter 34:03
If you know, it’s these, like these automated marketers that will send the final email, which is, well, I guess you’re just lazy and not interested in my great offer, then. It’s like, Who taught you how to sell? How is this input? How is this worthwhile to you? This cannot be working.

Matt Watson 34:22
You ever get the one that said? You must have been eaten by an alligator. So please let me know what to do next or whatever. Like you can like all sorts of weird things.

Benjamin Ritter 34:31
That’s good for dating. I wouldn’t use that for selling.

Matt Watson 34:36
Well, so give us a teaser about your upcoming book entitled becoming fearless. Tell us a little more about that.

Benjamin Ritter 34:43
Yeah, tentative working title. But I learned in affirmations and kind of fortune cookie types of advice and such epiphanies light me up and I reflect on them and dive into them. So I wanted to do something similar for work in life advice in pretty much helping individuals become more empowered and accountable to create a career in life that they love. And a lot of that has to do with becoming fearless. So I cover different categories, from job satisfaction to Career Clarity, to leadership, to relationships, to living for yourself to mindset. And we will dive in, we’ll have one topic kind of like a cookie cutter, not cookie cutter, fortune cookie type of title. And then we’ll review the situation that this occurs, and then what it actually is and what action can you take? And then what does it look like when you finally become fearless? And so it will, it’s not, like each one of these points will probably be a page or a couple of pages. But it’s not; it’s going to help you dive in further to your own thoughts and your own transformation through pretty much like words and pieces of advice that spark more from you. So I’m really excited about this book. It relates to my fearless Fridays that I do every single Friday on my podcast, and hopefully creates an impact.

Matt Watson 36:13
Well, so when you say fearless, what what, in what context? What do you mean there?

Benjamin Ritter 36:18
So a lot of what I’ve been talking about today is giving yourself permission to do whatever the hell you want to do. Absolutely. Like, this thing makes me happy. I want to talk to this person. I want to work on more of this stuff. That’s being fearless. It’s saying, I give myself permission, because no one else will. And I’ll be waiting a long time if I’m really waiting for permission for other people. And no one else is accountable for my satisfaction and my success. And so I’m going to be fearless and do the things that I truly want to do.

Matt Watson 36:56
I like it. And I think I’m one of those, those people that’s just naturally kind of fearless and all the time. And my wife is the opposite. My wife lives kind of like always in a state of fear and doesn’t have Islamic, a lot of confidence. And so we’re like polar opposites of each other.

Benjamin Ritter 37:14
It’s an exhausting way to live. And being or being afraid being Yeah, being fearless is a wonderful way to live to be able to be funny. I think we have similar relationships. And we were having some campervan trouble. And I needed to call this mechanic that we needed to talk to and I picked up the phone, and I called her. And she was looking at me with this weird look, and I go, what’s up? She goes, I just don’t know how you do that. I go, What do you mean, you just call people? It’s like this. Yeah. And it’s yeah, it’s like this. Some people are impacted by their stress and fear, anxiety. And when you’re fearless, you do the things that you need to do.

Matt Watson 38:00
Yeah, we had lunch today, we went to lunch, we went to Pottery Barn because we were looking for kids furniture. We’re having our fifth kid and I told her she should cancel something she ordered and order something different. She’s like, well, I don’t know if we can do that. And I’m like, yeah, we can until you prove we can’t. Right, like, it’s the old mentality, right? It’s just it’s the fearless part of it.

Benjamin Ritter 38:24
People respect fearlessness, they really do. Especially if you do it in a way where you care about other people like I’m not doing, I’m not doing anything to harm you. I’m asking you for something or telling you something that I want. And I’m doing it in a way that is not is not trying to hurt anyone else and actually is leading us all towards the goals that we have.

Matt Watson 38:47
Well, as we wrap up the episode today, I do want to remind everybody if you need to hire software engineers, testers, or leaders, Full Scale can help. We have the people on the platform to help you build and manage a team of experts when you visit FullScale.io. All you need to do is answer a few questions and let the platform match you up with our fully vetted, highly experienced team of software engineers. At Full Scale. We specialize in building a long-term team that works only for you to learn more when you visit FullScale.io. Well, Dr. Benjamin Ritter, thank you so much for being on the show again. And hopefully, we’ll have you back a third time in the future, maybe after your book is done or something.

Benjamin Ritter 39:23
Yeah, I’d love to add just a little message to everybody. It may seem a little far-fetched if you’re stuck in your career and you’re not really happy. But I’d like you to pause and try to remember a time when you were or another part of your life where you are. And why is that the case? Did you have anything to do about it? And did you take some sort of action that helped that? So you’ve done it before. We’re just doing it in a different environment.

Matt Watson 39:54
I like it. Well, any other final thoughts before we wrap up the show today?

Benjamin Ritter 40:01
Well, if you like what I’m saying here, check out the last episode of self-leadership. I forgot which number that was, but you people can search for it. And follow me on LinkedIn, Dr. Benjamin Ritter, and go to live for yourself consulting to get your free guide to creating a career that you love, as well as find the link for the masterclass in the last episode that was published August 14, 2020.

Matt Watson 40:20
So people might have to scroll a long way back. But you can search “self-leadership” on the podcast apps, and you can find it. Well, again, thank you so much for being on the show today. And again, this was Dr. Benjamin Ritter. If anybody can use your help, they know how to find you. Also, I would recommend people join our Facebook group, the Startup Hustle Chat. There are a lot of good conversations going on there every day. You can also find me on LinkedIn and TikTok, and Instagram; all these places. Just Matt Watson KC. And well, Ben, thank you so much for being on the show today.

Benjamin Ritter 41:00
It’s been great to be here. And if you liked this episode, leave a review.

Matt Watson 41:04
Yes, thank you.

Benjamin Ritter 41:05
That’s a wonderful thing to do.

Matt Watson 41:07
All right. Thank you, guys.